A Breakfast Club Parody
by Wari
Summary: A fun-filled parody of that classic 80s flick! Yeah...there will be SLASH in later chapters. These things take time, y'know?
1. Saturday Morning

Title: A Breakfast Club Parody  
  
Author: Wari  
  
E-mail: fa_chan@yahoo.com  
  
Rating: R for bad language, drug use, and SLASH  
  
Archive?: Sure, just ask for my permission.  
  
Feedback: I crave your comments so bring them on!   
  
Comments: This is based solely on the classic 80s flick, "The Breakfast Club."  
  
Disclaimer: I do not own any of the Mighty Ducks characters. Disney does. And as for "The Breakfast Club", I don't claim any rights to it, either. I'm not that brilliant, you know? :P  
  
WARNING: Everyone portrayed is majorly OOC! Julie is a prissy stuck-up, Portman is a bad-ass (hey, stop looking at me like that), Charlie is a jock (well, I guess that wasn't so off-the-mark), Adam's weird and has problems (well…it's different from how he normally acts, ok?), and Ken is "the stereotyped smart Asian kid".  
  
Note: I promise to be more original in the future. I'm just a little wary to be parodying such a classic, but I'll get over it soon.  
  
---------------------  
  
(Ken's POV)  
  
Saturday, March 24, 1998.   
  
Eden Hall Academy, Minneapolis, Minnesota.   
  
Dear Dean Buckley,  
  
We accept the fact that we had to sacrifice a whole Saturday in detention for whatever it was we did wrong. And what we did was wrong, but we think you're crazy to make us write an essay telling you who we think we are. What do you care? You see us as you want to see us. In the simplest terms -- the most convenient of definitions: You see us as a brain, an athlete, a basket case, a princess, and a criminal. Correct? That's the way we saw each other at seven o' clock this morning.   
  
We were brainwashed.  
  
---------------------  
  
Julie reclined in the passenger seat of her father's BMW, pouting out the window.   
  
"I can't believe you couldn't get me out of this. Things like this just doesn't happen to me," she complained and, flashing her doe eyes, turned to her father for some sympathy. "Daddy, am I a defective?"  
  
Mr. Gaffney patted her shoulder gently. "No, honey, of course not. But skipping class to go shopping isn't an excuse."  
  
"But, Daddy! I'm going to waste an entire Saturday in DETENTION! Do you know how demeaning that is?"  
  
"Well, you should have thought about that before you skipped, right?" he reasoned, giving her a weak smile. Julie quieted down and stared disdainfully at the school steps.   
  
"Is Mom going to ground me for this?" she asked, playing with her bracelets.  
  
"Sweetheart, don't listen to your mother. I'm not grounding you, ok?" Mr. Gaffney handed Julie her lunch. "I promise to make it up to you."  
  
Julie frowned, shrugging a slender shoulder, and grabbed her purse. She opened the door and stepped out, looking sullen. "Bye, Daddy."   
  
Without waiting for a reply, she shut the door and headed up the steps. As Julie ascended the stairs, a station wagon pulled up behind the BMW. Inside was a Korean family consisting of a mother, a son, and a daughter. Mrs. Wu parked the station wagon and looked over her daughter, Sohl, and at her son, Ken.  
  
"Is this the first or last time we do this, young man?" asked Mrs. Wu.  
  
Ken sighed. "Last."  
  
"Good, and since you're going to be here all day, use your time wisely and study, understand?" she warned in a stern voice. Ken craned his head to look at his mother and past his sister, who wore an evil smile on her 'angelic' face.  
  
"Mom, it's detention. You're not allowed to study. Besides, you're supposed to sit around and do nothing. That's just how it works," Ken explained as he grabbed his lunch, one hand already pushing the door open.  
  
"Don't you get an attitude with me! You WILL find some way to study because I'm not going to let you waste your time and throw your future away!" she scolded Ken, the act making Sohl absolutely giggle with joy. Ken nodded in defeat, got out, and slammed the door. After the station wagon drove out of sight, he proceeded to trudge up the stairs.  
  
Meanwhile, a beige GM Jimmy rolled up to the school's driveway. Charlie Conway blinked and stopped playing with his Varsity hockey patch as his father put the gear in park. The man's gruff voice invaded his thoughts.   
  
"Hey, I screwed around when I was a kid. Guys screw around, it's ok. Except you got caught, sport."  
  
"Dad, Mom already gave me the third-degree, all right?" Charlie started, only to be silenced by the pissed-off look on his father's face.  
  
"Hey! You wanna miss the game tonight? You wanna blow your ride? I certainly don't got the money to send you to school. Besides, no college is gonna offer scholarships to a discipline case!"  
  
Holding his tongue, Charlie stared momentarily at his father then quietly got out. Shortly, the GM drove off.   
  
Across the yard, Dean Portman strolled up to the driveway, hands stuffed inside the pockets of his ratty jacket. A pair of dark sunglasses perched above his nose obscured his eyes. He stepped off the grass and onto the pavement of the driveway. Then from out of nowhere, a periwinkle Cadillac screeched to a halt just before hitting him, but Dean didn't flinch.   
  
Not at all.   
  
He reached the stairs as a figure clad in black slinked out of the Cadillac. Adam Banks shouldered his awkwardly huge bag and walked over to the passenger side window of the car, where his mother sat. He was about to peer inside when unexpectedly, his father peeled out of the driveway, leaving him standing alone and confused. After a minute, he too, went up the stairs and walked to the library, which strangely, was to serve as the detention room this eventful weekend.  
  
---------------------  
  
To say that the library was 'huge' was definitely an understatement. But that still didn't change the fact that the library WAS huge.  
  
Along with a giant wall clock mounted over the bay window on the second floor, logos of the Eden Hall Warriors were emblazoned from everywhere, including the balcony of the second-floor reference section. Wherever one would look, thousands and thousands of tomes lined the shelves of both the upper and lower floors of the enormous room, which was also decorated in the traditional school colors. Unfortunately, the display wasn't majestic enough to impress the group of rag-tag teenagers gathered inside, especially when it was seven in the morning, a time WAY too early for anyone to be up and serving sentence in detention.  
  
Julie sat at the front table with Ken already settled at one table behind her. Charlie came in next, and seeing that Julie was the only person he recognized in the room, he gestured to a seat at her table. She gave him a small smile and shrugged carelessly. Charlie returned it and sat down.   
  
Seconds later, Dean stepped through the doors large double doors, which were propped open. He toyed with the objects on the circulation desk, 'accidentally' dropping in some pads of sticky-notes into his pocket, and made his way to where Ken sat. He shooed the small boy out of the seat with his menacing stature. Not wanting any trouble, Ken immediately got up and got out of the taller boy's way.   
  
Dean smirked and sat, propping his feet on the seat across from him and adjusting the skull-n-crossbones bandanna tied around his head. As Dean took off his shades, Charlie turned around in his chair to throw him an annoyed look, which he pointedly brushed off with a loud yawn. Meanwhile, Ken finally drifted over to a table across from his and meekly sat down.   
  
The four sat around dumbly for a minute or so until Adam hurried into the room, head bowed, his dirty blonde hair obscuring his face. Their scrutinizing gazes followed the strange boy as he hastened to the corner table all the way in the back and plopped down facing away from the group. Charlie caught Julie's eye and snickered, nodding towards Adam. Julie grinned.  
  
Suddenly, their heads snapped from the back of the room where Adam sat and to the front of the room as Dean Buckley stiffly entered the library with a curious look on his face. A man in his early fifties, the Dean wore a gray, tailored suit, for which the pants came up a little past his ankles, accompanied with suspenders and thick-framed bi-focal lenses, which clung onto the breast pocket of his jacket. Clearing his throat, he came to stand before the five students.  
  
"Well, well, well, I'm glad to see that you all are on time. It's good to know that everyone's taking this detention sentence seriously," he acknowledged condescendingly.  
  
Julie raised her hand, interrupting the Dean's speech.  
  
"Sir, excuse me, but I don't think I belong in here," she said a matter-of-factly. Julie looked affronted as Dean Buckley ignored her statement and continued his memorized lecture.  
  
"I hope you know that what you all did was wrong. Here at Eden Hall Academy, you do the crime, you do the time…"  
  
Dean lounged in his seat, tuning out the Dean's ranting. He'd heard it so many times before. In fact, just last Saturday, the Dean had given him and the other detention-goers the exact same crap.   
  
To amuse himself, he hocked up a loogie, spit it up in the air and caught it in his mouth effortlessly. Unfortunately, Julie happened to catch sight of the disgusting display. She instantly blanched and looked away, which earned a waggle of the eyebrows accompanied with an evil smile from Dean.  
  
"They'll be no talking, no moving, no sleeping, no nothing," Dean Buckley's voice abruptly cut into his antics. Somewhere behind Charlie, Dean scoffed.   
  
"Ok, boys and girls, we're going to try something new today," Buckley said, clapping his hands together excitedly. He went around the room, placing a sheet of paper and a pencil in front of each of them. "You have the honor of writing me an essay of no less than a 1,000 words, telling me about who you think you are."  
  
Buckley approached Dean and slapped the writing utensils onto his desk. "And when I say '1,000 words', I don't mean one word repeated a thousand times. Is that clear, Portman?"  
  
"Crystal, sir," he replied sarcastically then followed up with a fake, bright smile.  
  
"Good. Now, I hope you learn something from this, if anything. Maybe you'll decide whether or not you care to return to Eden Hall next year, buster."  
  
Dean stared at Dean Buckley nonchalantly.  
  
At hearing this, however, Ken quickly stood up and addressed the Dean.  
  
"You know, for me personally, I can answer that question right now, sir --"  
  
Dean Buckley turned to Ken, nostrils flaring. "Sit down, Wu!" he bellowed.  
  
Ken squeaked and promptly sat down. "Sitting, sir."  
  
Dean Buckley sighed and massaged his aching temples. He hated teenagers. They think they know everything. Whippersnappers punks, all of them! Taking a deep breath to steady his anger, he spoke again.  
  
"Now, my office is right across the hall. Any form of monkey business is ill-advised, do you understand?"  
  
It was Dean's turn to raise his hand. "I got a question, sir. Does Steve Urkel know that you raid his wardrobe?"  
  
Charlie and Julie couldn't help but snicker quietly at the joke. Dean Buckley, however, was not amused in the slightest bit.  
  
"Well, I've got the answer to that question next Saturday, Mr. Portman. Now, all of you, get to work!"  
  
With that said, the Dean stormed out of the library and into his office. 


	2. Not Your Ordinary Motley Crew

Title: A Breakfast Club Parody (2/?)  
  
Author: Wari  
  
E-mail: fa_chan@yahoo.com  
  
Rating: R for bad language, drug use, and SLASH  
  
Archive?: Sure, just ask for my permission.  
  
Feedback: I crave your comments so bring them on!   
  
Comments: This is based solely on the classic 80s flick, "The Breakfast Club."  
  
Disclaimer: I do not own any of the Mighty Ducks characters. Disney does. And as for "The Breakfast Club", I don't claim any rights to it, either. I'm not that brilliant, you know? :P  
  
WARNING: Everyone portrayed is majorly OOC! Julie is a prissy stuck-up, Portman is a bad-ass (hey, stop looking at me like that), Charlie is a jock (well, I guess that wasn't so off-the-mark), Adam's weird and has problems (well…it's different from how he normally acts, ok?), and Ken is "the stereotyped smart Asian kid".  
  
---------------------------------------  
  
Shortly after Dean Buckley's departure, everyone calmed down, kicked back, and relaxed. Dean, Ken, Julie, and Charlie were practically falling asleep with their eyes open, boredom already having settled over the majority of the group. Adam, however, was sitting in the back and biting off his fingernails, spitting the bits of chewed up keratin in all kinds of different directions.  
  
Initially, no one noticed, or rather, no one cared. But after so many minutes of hearing loud, rhythmic 'clacking' and spitting noises, the others just could stand it any longer. Slowly, they all turned to stare incredulously at Adam, who continued gnawing, blissfully unaware of the strange looks he was receiving.   
  
He was finally pulled from his rapt state of mind by Dean's smooth voice.   
  
"Hey."  
  
Adam cracked opened one eye and glared at Dean, who was, of course, unaffected by the look.  
  
"If you manage to eat your entire hand now, then you're not gonna be hungry for lunch, kid."  
  
Julie rolled her eyes at Dean's comment and turned back to the front of the room. Adam narrowed his eye and hatefully spit some of his chewed nails at Dean.   
  
Following the minor episode, boredom gradually set in once more. As an alternative to the monotony, Ken stuck a couple of pens up his nose, poorly imitating a walrus and inadvertently attracting Dean's attention from across the aisle. The older boy glowered at him, and immediately, he pulled the pens out of his nostrils and stuffed them back inside the backpack his mother had insisted he bring along.  
  
Quickly losing interest in Ken and his exploits, Dean hummed a little tune to himself, picked up his piece of paper, waded it up into a ball, and threw it at Julie, barely missing the back of her head. Julie flinched as the ball of paper flew past her ear. Turning to Charlie, she deadpanned, "I can't believe this is really happening to me."  
  
"Oh, shit! I just thought of something!" Dean interjected, drawing attention to himself.   
  
"What?" Charlie asked, annoyed.  
  
Dean looked at him with huge, exaggerated eyes. "What if we have to take a piss?? Oh, man, because I REALLY have to go NOW!" Dean soundly unzipped his trousers and closed his eyes, his actions earning him plenty of protests from Julie and Charlie.  
  
"Eww, someone stop him!" commanded Julie, who had gotten up and walked as far as possible away from Dean.  
  
Charlie stood and gave Dean the evil eye. "No way, José. You're not peeing in here. And that's not a request."   
  
"Shhh!! Don't talk! Don't talk or it won't come," Dean said, concentrating hard on the matter at hand.   
  
"You're disgusting, you know that?" Julie spat from across the room. Dean finally opened his eyes and smirked, zipping up his fly. Suckers, the whole lot of 'em, he thought triumphantly. "You're not the first to tell me that, babe," he laughed at the scowl that had distorted Julie's pretty face.  
  
"Just shut the hell up, Portman."  
  
Raising an eyebrow, Dean cocked his head in Charlie's direction. "What's the matter, Sport-o? Am I too much for you? Aww, I'm really sorry about that."  
  
Giving Dean one last contemptuous look, Charlie took a deep breath and sat down, turning back around in his seat. This jerk wasn't worth getting into any more trouble for. Besides, he had to make the crucial hockey game tonight. He can at least not screw up that commitment he had made to his dad.   
  
As Dean and Charlie lapsed back into silence, Julie edged back to her seat. She sat down, casting a wary glance over her shoulder at Dean. At that moment, Dean lifted his eyes from the desktop to spy her watching him. Caught staring, Julie broke eye contact and turned her head away with a cough.  
  
After dismissing Julie's odd stare, Dean leaned back and propped his feet on top of the table to face Ken, who surprisingly hasn't started on his paper. "Hey, you," he addressed the smaller boy.  
  
Ken had been counting the number of tiles in the ceiling, oblivious to his surroundings. He brought his attention from the ceiling of the library to stare dumbly at Dean. "Me?"  
  
"Yeah, you, Poindexter."  
  
Ken wrote off the mild insult with a small laugh.   
  
"Say, why don't you go close that door," Dean suggested, nodding at the double doors. "We could have quite a party with little miss popularity over here," he finished, leering at Julie.  
  
Julie's eyes widened as she turned her head to yell at Dean. "You asshole! Leave me out of this!"  
  
"Yeah," Charlie added in Julie's defense. "And if I lose my temper, then you're totaled, man."  
  
"Totally?" Dean mocked.  
  
"Totally," Charlie promised, looking like he wanted to murder the other teenager.  
  
From his obscure corner, Adam watched the whole scene from underneath his bangs. He held back a chortle as Julie joined the banter.  
  
"Puh-leeze, nobody here's interested," chimed Julie, who looked absolutely annoyed and insulted.   
  
"Really," Charlie scoffed. "Butt-face."  
  
Dean laughed at them both. "Whatever, man. Whatever."  
  
A few minutes later, order was reestablished yet again; however, peace didn't last too long, since Dean saw fit to start up another one of his 'conversations.' First, he needed to pick a target. His eyes fell on Charlie.  
  
"Well, Sport-o, what did you do to get in this joint? Forget to wash your jock, perhaps?" he teased, knowing that Charlie would easily take the bait.  
  
"Uh, I don't think we're supposed to be speaking," said Ken and all eyes turned to acknowledge him. Dean disregarded his comment and continued taunting Charlie.  
  
"Well?"  
  
"Hey, just because you're in here with the rest of us doesn't give you the right to be a major pain in the ass," Charlie countered, narrowing his eyes at Dean, who shrugged offhandedly.  
  
"It's a free country, fella. I can do whatever the hell I please."  
  
"Charlie," Julie butt in on his behalf and threw Dean a mean look. "He's just doing it to get a rise out of you. Ignore him, okay?"  
  
Dean pouted at her. "Aww, sweetie, you couldn't ignore me if you tried." He blew her a kiss and laughed at the disgusted expression on her face. At that moment, he decided that his favorite pastime was officially to annoy the hell out of Julie in every possible way.   
  
By now, Adam was perched precariously on his chair, observing the general chaos emitting from the front of the library. Smiling gleefully, he watched them with a spark of curiosity in his kohl-lined, blue eyes.  
  
Unexpectedly, Dean gaped, as if he'd had an epiphany. "Whoa!" he exclaimed, gesturing to both Charlie and Julie. "So…are you guys boyfriend/girlfriend?"  
  
Julie stared at Charlie, giving him a 'here-we-go-again' look. In the background, Dean continued with his questions.  
  
"Steady dates?"  
  
Charlie returned the look and tightly clenched his fist.   
  
"Or are you two fuck buddies?"   
  
Julie tensed in her chair. She could tell that Charlie was as aggravated as she was. In fact, he looked like he was prone to explode at any given moment. Ken was trying to mind his own business and start his essay, like a good student. He had to finish his essay quickly, so he could get to studying and make use of this stupid Saturday detention. Nevertheless, he still couldn't help but listen in on their conversation and the argument that would definitely ensue. Adam, on the other hand, stared openly to the three, amusement lighting his face.   
  
"Come on. Level with me, Sport-o, do you slip her the hot…beef…injection?"  
  
That was undeniably the straw that broke the camel's back. Julie and Charlie lashed out at Dean immediately.  
  
"Enough!" Charlie yelled, getting up and making his way towards Dean.  
  
"Go to hell, you fucker!" shouted Julie, looking like she was ready to jump out of her chair to throttle Dean.  
  
Ken's eyes were as wide as saucers. He instantly scrambled out of his chair and away from the Charlie, Julie, and Dean.   
  
Following their outburst, they all heard footsteps, belonging to none other than Dean Buckley, who was approaching from the entrance. Ken hurried back to his table and threw himself into his chair just in time as the Dean entered the library.  
  
Indeed, Dean Buckley, face contorted with anger, marched up to stand in front of the room.   
  
"What in the blazes is going on here?! Conway? Portman?"  
  
His mission to pound the crap out of Dean quickly forgotten, Charlie ran back to his table and at the sound of Dean Buckley's bellow. Julie and Portman hastily followed his example.  
  
The three pretended to look clueless and play dumb, while Ken went back to staring at his blank sheet of paper. Adam giggled loudly from his corner, attracting the Dean's attention. He pointed a shaky finger at Adam.  
  
"You better watch it, young man!"  
  
Adam's response was only to smile and coquettishly bat his eyelashes at the Dean, who went on with his reprimand.  
  
"Whatever you all are doing in here, just know that you can never pull the wool over MY eyes," he warned.  
  
"Baa~~!"   
  
Julie would've giggled at Dean's clowning around, if she wasn't so mad at him.  
  
The Dean's eyes narrowed at the trouble-maker. "Ha ha. I'll let that slide for now, Mr. Portman. But if I see or hear any more trouble coming from here, I can guarantee that everybody's going down."  
  
For the second time that morning, Dean Buckley stormed out, muttering about punks and teenagers.  
  
Silence reigned until Dean spoke up, poking a thumb in the direction of the doorway.  
  
"I dunno about you guys, but did he just threaten us?" 


	3. Robots and Urinal Cakes

Title: A Breakfast Club Parody (3/?)  
  
Author: Wari  
  
E-mail: fa_chan@yahoo.com  
  
Rating: R for bad language, drug use, and SLASH  
  
Archive?: Sure, just ask for my permission.  
  
Feedback: I crave your comments so bring them on!   
  
Comments: This is based solely on the classic 80s flick, "The Breakfast Club."  
  
Disclaimer: I do not own any of the Mighty Ducks characters. Disney does. And as for "The Breakfast Club", I don't claim any rights to it, either. I'm not that brilliant, you know? :P  
  
--------------------------  
  
"I dunno about you guys, but did he just threaten us?"  
  
Dean received no replies. He shrugged to himself and got out of his chair, walking over to check if the coast was clear. From what he saw, Dean Buckley was nowhere in sight. He cackled gleefully and turned around, clearing his throat as if he was going to make an important announcement.   
  
"Excuse me, everyone."  
  
"Shut up, Portman. We don't want anymore trouble," muttered Charlie, who had folded up his sheet of paper into a football and was trying to play a game with himself..  
  
"Was I speaking to you?"  
  
Charlie flipped him off.  
  
"The feeling's mutual," answered Dean. "Well, before I was so rudely interrupted by Mister Know-It-All," he shot Charlie an cutting look, "I was going to suggest that we go close that door. Now, what do you say, class?"   
  
"Portman, just fuckin' leave everyone out of this. YOU may be a sad-ass loser in detention, but WE're not. So don't try to rub your sorry state of affairs on the rest of us."  
  
Dean scoffed and got out of his chair. "Excuse me? *I* am the sorry one? I wouldn't be talking if I were you, Sport-o." He strode over to Charlie's table, bending over so he was eye-level with the other teen. "All you do is beat other guys with your little stick and get a fancy letterman jacket for it. You'll never be anything but one of the school's robots, I'm afraid." Straightening up, Dean made his way to another table and leaned against it, smiling complacently.  
  
Charlie fumed. "Well, what do you know about being a hockey player, Portman? You've never done anything useful in your screwed up life."  
  
"Oh, really? I may not be the hot-shot, varsity hockey team captain, but I know what goes on around here. I know how this school works."  
  
"Bull!" cried Charlie, now standing up and sneering. "You don't even count, you know that? You might as well not exist at this school."  
  
A momentary silence engulfed the room.  
  
Julie stared at Charlie and Dean, biting her lip. She certainly hadn't expected their argument to get this far. A few feet away sat Ken, who was also staring at the two. He idly wondered what would happen between them if the verbal confrontation escalated into an all-out, physical brawl.   
  
Not pretty, he imagined.  
  
Meanwhile, Adam's eyes were glued to the pair ever since the first insults were exchanged. He noticed how Dean had slightly wavered, perhaps caught off guard when Charlie accused him of being a nobody.   
  
Adam snorted derisively.   
  
So Dean Portman wasn't made out of solid rock. He could be hurt just like anyone else in this room -- simple as that. Adam grinned impishly at the thought.  
  
"Well," Dean began, running a hand through his curly hair and rubbing the bridge of his nose. "How about I just run right out and join the hockey team?" he enthusiastically squealed, smugly taking in Charlie's sour expression. "Ooh! Or maybe the Prep club or the Student Council? What do you think, Sport-o?"  
  
Charlie let out a ridiculing laugh. "They wouldn't want you."  
  
"Hey, do you know why guys like you have to knock everything?" asked Julie, unexpectedly cutting into their argument.   
  
Dean turned his head, acknowledging her presence. "Enlighten me, babe," he encouraged her with a dismissive yawn.  
  
"You knock everything because you're afraid."   
  
Dean tried not to laugh at Julie's half-baked deduction. Instead, he put on a stupefied look and gasped.  
  
"Omigod! You richies are so smart! In fact, you hit the nail right on the head, sweet-thing. Gee, I wonder how long it took you to come up with that one."   
  
Julie stared at him with disdain. "First of all -- don't call me that. And second of all -- you're nothing but a coward."  
  
Before Dean could respond to her claim, it was Ken's turn to join the conversation.  
  
"Uh, I'm in the Advanced Placement Calculus club."  
  
After receiving several odd stares coming from four pair of eyes, Ken was ignored once more as Dean finally spoke up against Julie's allegation.   
  
"It wouldn't have anything to do with you 'activities people' being bonafide ass-holes now, would it?"   
  
Julie stuck her nose up defiantly, like she had everything figured out. "You're scared that you don't belong."  
  
"I'm in the Physics club, too."  
  
Dean's forehead wrinkled as he spun around to stare in annoyance at Ken.   
  
"What the hell are you going on about, man??" he questioned.  
  
Ken blinked owlishly and began counting his fingers. "I'm in the Calculus club, the Latin club, and the Physics club."  
  
Dean abruptly turned away from Ken to wryly address Julie. "So, are YOU in the Physics club?"  
  
Julie threw him an indignant look. "Of course not. That's an academic club."  
  
"So?"  
  
"Well, that's different from other clubs," Julie stated matter-of-factly.  
  
Dean gave a short laugh and Julie frowned. "What's so funny?" she asked.  
  
"Well, it seems to me that to dorks like him," he paused, pointing to Ken from across the aisle, "they aren't any different." Dean spun away from her to face Ken, asking, "So what do you do in Physics club?"  
  
Ken took a moment to think about it. "Well, we talk about physics in general and its aspects. Mostly properties and such."  
  
Dean grinned and slinked over to Julie's table -- all while steering clear of Charlie, who still looked pissed from their earlier fight.   
  
"From the looks of it, it's kind of social," he assessed, rubbing the fact in Julie's face. "Demented and sad, but social."  
  
Julie slowly began to turn as pink as her sweater when Ken spoke up again, completely oblivious to Dean's insult. "Um, the Physics club is pretty cool and we do a lot of things. Like, at the end of the year, we have a banquet and everybody dresses up. Last year, I had to borrow my dad's dress shoes and my mom got mad at me. She has this thing about me wearing other people's shoes. Well, anyway, she was pissed --" he stopped to take a quick breath and a glance at everyone, "-- and sometimes, at the banquets, there'd be these kids hanging out behind the building and getting high. I mean, they seemed pretty cool and all, but drugs are bad. Oh, don't get me wrong or anything! Personally, I have no problem with getting high and…"  
  
Charlie couldn't take it anymore. They were being too damn loud! He was afraid that Dean Buckley might come in any minute and they'd be in even more trouble than before.   
  
"Hey, shut up!" he warned and Ken finally stopped his ranting. Everyone stared at him and he felt slightly uncomfortable; consequently, he became defensive.  
  
"Hey, I can't afford to stay here any longer than I have to, okay? I have an important game tonight against Blake Academy and I can't screw it up because of you all."  
  
"Boo hoo. You're breakin' our hearts, Sport-o. Too disappointed that you're not gonna be able to sate your sado-masochistic desires by beating those other robots with your wittle sticky-wicky?"  
  
A sudden noise, sounding oddly like a 'squeak', made everybody's heads whip around to the corner of the room. Adam, his slim, black denim-clad legs akimbo, had fallen out of his chair to land as a messy heap on the floor. At seeing four curious faces observing him, he swiftly scurried back to his chair and sat down, facing away from the group.  
  
Dean spoke, raising a brow at Ken, Julie, and Charlie. "My, he's a weird one, isn't he?"  
  
Ignoring the comment, Charlie glared at Dean and picked up where they'd left off on their discussion. "You wouldn't know anything about it, Portman. The competition, the rush. You just don't know."  
  
Dean looked at him as if he'd grown another head. "Hey, at least I know that it's pretty retarded to be chasing around a little, black, urinal cake, all while skating after some robot and whackin' it with a stick."  
  
Julie couldn't help but snicker, while Ken looked amazed.  
  
"Wow, you guys play with urinal cakes and whack robots?" he asked with wide eyes.  
  
Charlie, who did not find the slandering of his beloved sport funny in the slightest bit, glared at Ken. "Shut up!" He then turned to Dean and shook his head. "And you -- I could care less about. You'll never understand anything."  
  
"Aw, you're breakin' my heart. Really," Dean responded, clutching his chest melodramatically.   
  
"Fuck you, man."  
  
Dean beamed. "Ditto, Sport-o."  
  
--------------------------  
  
Wari: Wow! Thanks for all the reviews, everyone!  
  
NYgoldfish54 -- Thanks for reading! I'm glad you like it!  
  
Rei-rei -- You rock! And sorry about your family. I know how they are, but cheer up coz you're not gonna be in school forver! Lol  
  
Bottles -- You've got to write more of your Adam/Charlie family series!! I absolutely loved "So You Want To Drink Alcohol." That was so cute! Oh, and I hope you enjoyed Ken's rant in this chapter. I love Ken. He's my baby daddy. ;)  
  
Geometrygal -- Haha, have you been seeing the insinuated slash so far? It's really subtle!  
  
Little Kaori solo Yuy-Maxwell -- OMG, you like Gundam Wing, too?? Kool! Haha, thanks for the review!  
  
And Quimby -- Ah, my favorite Cake-Eater! I'm glad you're enjoying the madness so far. ^__^ 


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